A few months ago, sooner after Grahame, Cal would have understood that more clearly; maybe once he's had more time to think about this conversation, that understanding will come back. It isn't that he's forgotten how it feels to have to reevaluate everything like that. He'll always remember. But he wasn't exaggerating about the incident with his father changing his perspective. There is nothing abstract, for him, about the only adult who occasionally seemed to like him wanting to kill him.

He glances uncertainly at Sherlock, not sure of where to go from here.